Lost My Spark...
a little but the overall opinion is that subconsciously I'm still grieving and its coming around to the date Mum passed away and even with my financial concerns when that date passes by I will pick up again. everyone is different and I have heard it said that it can take five years or more to come to terms with the loss of someone. And when its someone you are very close to...you'll cope but you'll never be quite the same.
Found some more clothes for the charity shop. I didn't buy anything today. Having a good final clear out of the outhouse now. I can work out there now the weather is warmer.
All will be clear for the visit on Monday of the workers servicing the central heating/checking the smoke/fire/carbon monoxide detectors etc...and the meter reader though I have already sent those readings into the website.
All I then have to do is a quick dust, vacuum(if the machine will work)and polish and I have ten days to get on top of that before the tenancy visit. If I am really on top of it all by morning...(I still have Sunday to do some more work)I may take myself off and ride around the N East on the buses and just go where they take me.
As long as I can catch a connecting service home in the evening but hearing the weather may be less than perfect and because I have tasks to finish I may put that plan off and do it next weekend or go midweek. I don't think I have anything lined up on Wednesday. Next weekend is out now I think about it because I watching a concert in a local church where the Durham Constabulary Choir are performing.
I can't go far on Monday(bingo in the afternoon)Tuesday its the Music Club in the evening. Thursday the little bingo club in the evening again. Lunchtime concert in Durham on Friday. So its Wednesday or nothing.
Had a quick ready meal of sausages, gravy and mashed potato that hit the spot. listened to a concert celebrating the life and music of Billie Holiday. Not a bad day and good news on the health front at the Dr's.
Found some more clothes for the charity shop. I didn't buy anything today. Having a good final clear out of the outhouse now. I can work out there now the weather is warmer.
All will be clear for the visit on Monday of the workers servicing the central heating/checking the smoke/fire/carbon monoxide detectors etc...and the meter reader though I have already sent those readings into the website.
All I then have to do is a quick dust, vacuum(if the machine will work)and polish and I have ten days to get on top of that before the tenancy visit. If I am really on top of it all by morning...(I still have Sunday to do some more work)I may take myself off and ride around the N East on the buses and just go where they take me.
As long as I can catch a connecting service home in the evening but hearing the weather may be less than perfect and because I have tasks to finish I may put that plan off and do it next weekend or go midweek. I don't think I have anything lined up on Wednesday. Next weekend is out now I think about it because I watching a concert in a local church where the Durham Constabulary Choir are performing.
I can't go far on Monday(bingo in the afternoon)Tuesday its the Music Club in the evening. Thursday the little bingo club in the evening again. Lunchtime concert in Durham on Friday. So its Wednesday or nothing.
Had a quick ready meal of sausages, gravy and mashed potato that hit the spot. listened to a concert celebrating the life and music of Billie Holiday. Not a bad day and good news on the health front at the Dr's.
posted by The Great Gildersleeve | 11:51 pm
2 Comments:
There is no time span for grieving,it might last two days or twenty years,I think our minds just cannot comprehend the absolute certainty that they are not coming back?....it's out of place with the rest of our lives which is so uncertain, fluid and changing all the time...something like that anyway.
Why don't you go on a cruise and get away from the place for a while and get new inspiration, a cruise has all facilities if your not so fast on your feet.
Thanks for a very thoughtful comment. I think you are right in all that you say, today is a good day. I'm not thinking too deeply and feel more myself. I've slept well and long and feel rested.
The work needs doing but I have 9 days before the visit and I am having a day off.
I believe I can holiday(assuming I can afford to)as long as I wish in the UK on the help I receive from the state or to put it another way, I suspect its a case of go for it and say nowt. Or...go away and come home and break the vacations up into pieces.
Officially if I go abroad classed as temporary one runs for 26 weeks before it is affected, the other lasts 4 weeks and then stops.
So perhaps a very small cruise away from these shores would be possible and if we're talking 2-3 days maybe I can getaway from even having to inform anyone.
The important thing is that I can be contacted during the time away.
Being on a fixed/low income I couldn't afford to go away too often especially if help is continually taken away and I have to keep closing and reopening claims.
Holidays in the UK would be fine(coach trips, B&B etc...)
I keep being told take a holiday and use some of Mum's windfall but again though my Dr says I should for my well being because I have to account with receipts what I spend so I don't get rid of capital for the sake of it that may not be possible.
They may allow a small one that doesn't look outrageous. I hear they do allow you to buy a car upto the value of £10,000 and that is acceptable.
So my plans of a mobility scooter, replacing carpets, curtains, laptop, tablet, beds, lounge furniture, decorating, a vacuum cleaner perhaps garden equipment doesn't seem that wrong(also paying for prescriptions, utility bills, food)I may not be able to do everything in my list. It will soon disappear.
I may try and put a holiday in the list and see if its accepted. Perhaps with medical support from a Dr they'll say "Yes" :-)
I never thought that I would but I may put a little notice in the town's free sheet next week in remembrance of Mum.
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