One More Thing...
Here's a little sad post...I know that Christmas will be difficult. I can see a box of Christmas crackers in my bedroom I never got to pull with Mum and I cannot do them on my own.
I guess I'll give them away!
Can't bring myself to give away/throw away Mum's clothes but I'm not going to keep looking at them. I'll put them in the wardrobe and decide what to do later. If I have to move a lack of space may mean I have no choice. It's too early to decide what's best.
I guess I'll give them away!
Can't bring myself to give away/throw away Mum's clothes but I'm not going to keep looking at them. I'll put them in the wardrobe and decide what to do later. If I have to move a lack of space may mean I have no choice. It's too early to decide what's best.
posted by The Great Gildersleeve | 7:53 pm
10 Comments:
I eventually gave my mum's clothes to the Cancer Research charity shop.
It's possible that they may come and collect them if that's what you decide to do.
Is your voice any better, Gildy?
That's sounds as good an idea as any VQ. Once they go...there is literally nothing to show Mum was here(though she was and is still in my heart.
I was sat at the bus stop and someone stopped and told me they had seen the notice in the local freesheet(I haven't seen it yet myself)she went to school with me.
She said what a lovely lady she was(I did not know she knew Mum)turns out remembers her from when she took me to school(How long ago is that?)and then Mum did some voluntary work at school and helped teach her child and she remembered how popular she was with the children.
And again as a parent. Everyone mentions her nature but also remembers how lovely she was dressed.
I think my voice is improving...slowly. I can rest the voice now(no one to talk to)I went to bed around 8pm to lay listening to the radio and...fell asleep.
I said that I don't want to get into the habit of going to bed for hours but it is warm and its a comfortable way to listen to the radio rather than just sit hear with it coming through the pc and staying up until all hours.
So perhaps I will be in bed a lot. Time will tell...
Rightly I have been given a slap for giving Mum's age away...not in the newspaper at least.
Want to pull a virtual Christmas cracker?
http://creative.dialmediagroup.com/crackermatic/portland/index.html
Gildy, it may sound harsh but get all your mum's clothes and give them to charity, as soon as possible. And 'spring clean' the whole house...again.
Gildy, you don't have to give away ALL of you mum's clothes. You could keep back one or two items that she particularly loved, as mementos.
I'll pull a virtual cracker with you any time you like. :-)
Gildy I have only just heard the news from Span about your Mum dying. I am so sorry for your loss and I sincerely hope that you do not admonish yourself in anyway over her death. Your written words have shown what a caring loving son you were and I am so glad that you were brave enough to share your thoughts with us all. I know from personal experience that using a blog can be a cathartic experience in many ways.
Paul.
They always thought Jimmy Saville was bit strange keeping his Mum's clothes, but when life happens, it all becomes very clear and understandable why he did it.
However the reverse happens for a lot of people, that is they suddenly throw or give everything away.You have to remember (and so do toher people) that your in a state of mourning and you have to give yourself time before you make decesions you might regret later.
You say about becoming a lodger, but now is not the time to be stuck in a single room all day doing nothing, keep the house while you can, its demands will keep you occupied and then perhaps
later you can consider your new life somewhere else perhaps?
Thank You Paul,
In many ways its going to be very different.
Even writing a blog gave me something to do and a reason to do so.
Now a lot of what happens in the world is important and it has to go on...a lot of what is going on is not important or of interestto me(and that's not a case of being depressed)just that you realise what is important personally to you.
Chasing after money, fame, lots of possessions etc...mean nothing(I always knew that)but when you lose a loved one it brings it home all the more.
Thanks for your good wishes...
VQ, Christmas will be tough but I may be surprised, I'll know better at the time.
I could see how for many it is a difficult time when it is very much a family time.
And the media has so many programmes with a Christmas theme.
We never really liked New Years Eve either.
We appreciated how fortunate we were that we had had another year together and hoped we could say the same the next.
I say I don't want to spend hours in bed Anon but its comfortable, warm and an easy way to enjoy listening to the radio, otherwise you are just making yourself sit in a chair for the sake of it, getting up for the sake of it, if you are in a house alone, there is really only two things you can do(apart from doing a quick house clean, cook a meal)and it would be the same even if you go out to work, shop or whatever, you still have to come home and then either sit in a chair or lay down.
I can understand how easy it is to get into the habit of going to bed.
Unless you are able to afford and go away on holiday there isn't much else to do.
There aren't many places locally and easy to get to without transport to make it worth going out, I don't want to walk around streets of houses(its difficult for me anyhow)and I don't want to be the saddo sitting on a seat in a town centre, in café drinking cup after cup of tea or in a not so nice park for hours and hours.
Besides, in this day and age a single male sitting alone will probably be seen as a danger if there are chidren around.
I'm not surprised that many people spend ages slumped over a pc on the internet for hours...
Lots of people go into a town and sit, without drinking endless cups of tea! People watching is a well known way of passing time without it being suspicious. Plenty of elderly men sit and pass the day, and who knows whether they are single/married/widowed or divorced. Much better than spending hours on your own in bed! You need to get out as often as you can.
I suspect there is only so much people watching I'd want to do.
Really, when you think about it whether in work or out of work, most days are routine and very much the same and even if you get a sense of achievement or purpose and feel you are contributing to society, its still the same things most people do daily.
That's probably why some feel lost when their working lives come to an end and then they decide to carry on doing voluntary work.
Of course adapt and look forward to not having to get up every day and hopefully enjoy either doing very little or doing all those things they did not have the time to do when working.
Everyone is different.
This winter, I've spent more time in bed than ever before.
It has been so cold and, as you say, Gildy, it's the best place for listening to the radio and/or reading whilst keeping warm.
I've read so many books this winter too.
I discovered an online book-swapping club. You never pay for a book, just for the postage to another person with whom you're swapping. (So it's best to stick to paperbacks.)..................
http://www.readitswapit.co.uk/TheLibrary.aspx
The library is another place to keep warm (providing your local one is still open.) These days, as well as books, they also have DVDs, CDs, computers and copying machines.
In my local one, you're allowed to use a computer, free of charge, for up to two hours a day.
We should form a club..... "How to keep warm and out of mischief for the over 50s"!
Post a Comment
<< Home