I've Just Had A Record Played On The Radio...

For Mum...

I'd always meant to but the situation has hurried things up somewhat. We listen every week. I think she was pleased and he mentioned Mum's name and my message at least three times(and no I had not told him the background to the dedication)

The DJ will have no idea how many of the dedications he reads out have those heart breaking, tug at the heartstrings reasons behind them. As it was a text what I could say was limited and he had to choose the music but it went well and he picked a song with an appropriate title, Teresa Brewer - I Think The World Of You and it was released the year I was born.

I'll not keep playing it but I'll keep it as a kind of memory...a keep sake.

I keep hoping for a miracle or a change of attitude to what care/treatment Mum will be offered when we go back for the results.

Mum is going through three main emotions/reactions at present, don't talk about it, whatever will be will be and I think I'll beat it and I think that there is an improvement.

If any of those three reactions help what more can I ask.

I'm going along with her, I think I've asked enough questions and said enough about what is likely to happen and Mum doesn't need to know how much time she has, taken away with such sad thoughts. After all that's why they sometimes say no to treatment because you don't want to be pulled every way when your last days could be peaceful.

All we've been offered so far is that some of the bulk can be taken out of the growth...that's not even removal. No radio therapy either. Dare I hope that they'll change their minds?

Tomorrow we are visited for the first time by our District Nurse service to be assessed.

I Love You Mum xx