I Can't Change Anything...
And that really hurts.
I know Friday is coming and nothing can be done.
Mum is panicking a bit. She's just woke out of a restful sleep and the first thing she said is "I Want To Get Better!" Of course all I can say is "I Want You To!" and "I Know That You Do!"
Even I find myself waking up, if I manage to doze, I immediately have that knotted feeling in my stomach and feel worked up.
It takes a lot to stop my mind racing away and take one day at a time.
The carer has been again and done what she does, she thought Mum was brighter.
Another person who works for the company came to fill in a care plan but it doesn't really amount to anything more than a little bit of a potted history of Mum. A couple of questions have wrong answers but not enough to really affect things and they will not affect the drama we are now facing and the care and how Mum's illness will progress. One answer says Mum cannot put her shoes on...she can!
That she has a history of falling. She's had two major falls that needed hospital care but is that a history?
And one of those wasn't really a fall, she went down onto the bed and rolled off. If she had not rolled off she'd have been OK.
The person doing the plan asked if Mum could get off the bed and walk. Today with her walking stick she was quite nifty and did. But her legs are so thin...
Having said that Mum is putting on weight and I am not imagining that she is...last week her ribs were less noticeable now her tummy is filling out again...Is it the blood transfusion, getting more nourishment into her or both? I don't know.
Mum's already had a cup of tea and two complans(Banana and Chicken)but with the fridge/freezer out of action what to feed Mum tonight so she has something on her tummy. I thought could I get a small portion of rice with sweet and sour chicken? Otherwise it may have to be fish and chips again, then we're back to whatever I have in a can or the old faithful eggs(scrambled, fried, poached)Potatoes of course.
Please God we get some good news on Friday and its not all sadness, doom and gloom.
Not sure that I can add much more in these final few days before going to hospital for the results.
I think I've exhausted all my thoughts...after Friday, who knows what state we'll both be in. If its better news than expected we'll be shouting from the roof tops and there will be lots of giving thanks for a miracle.
If its bad there will be lots of tears, kissing, holding each other close, depression, worry and despair. And trying to support each other through difficult times.
I know Friday is coming and nothing can be done.
Mum is panicking a bit. She's just woke out of a restful sleep and the first thing she said is "I Want To Get Better!" Of course all I can say is "I Want You To!" and "I Know That You Do!"
Even I find myself waking up, if I manage to doze, I immediately have that knotted feeling in my stomach and feel worked up.
It takes a lot to stop my mind racing away and take one day at a time.
The carer has been again and done what she does, she thought Mum was brighter.
Another person who works for the company came to fill in a care plan but it doesn't really amount to anything more than a little bit of a potted history of Mum. A couple of questions have wrong answers but not enough to really affect things and they will not affect the drama we are now facing and the care and how Mum's illness will progress. One answer says Mum cannot put her shoes on...she can!
That she has a history of falling. She's had two major falls that needed hospital care but is that a history?
And one of those wasn't really a fall, she went down onto the bed and rolled off. If she had not rolled off she'd have been OK.
The person doing the plan asked if Mum could get off the bed and walk. Today with her walking stick she was quite nifty and did. But her legs are so thin...
Having said that Mum is putting on weight and I am not imagining that she is...last week her ribs were less noticeable now her tummy is filling out again...Is it the blood transfusion, getting more nourishment into her or both? I don't know.
Mum's already had a cup of tea and two complans(Banana and Chicken)but with the fridge/freezer out of action what to feed Mum tonight so she has something on her tummy. I thought could I get a small portion of rice with sweet and sour chicken? Otherwise it may have to be fish and chips again, then we're back to whatever I have in a can or the old faithful eggs(scrambled, fried, poached)Potatoes of course.
Please God we get some good news on Friday and its not all sadness, doom and gloom.
Not sure that I can add much more in these final few days before going to hospital for the results.
I think I've exhausted all my thoughts...after Friday, who knows what state we'll both be in. If its better news than expected we'll be shouting from the roof tops and there will be lots of giving thanks for a miracle.
If its bad there will be lots of tears, kissing, holding each other close, depression, worry and despair. And trying to support each other through difficult times.
posted by The Great Gildersleeve | 12:41 pm
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